Newsletters - Dating Q & A
Wanting to Move On
Wanting to Move On |
| Advice for the lovelorn. (For confidentiality purposes, names in the following letters have been changed.) Wanting to Move On Q. Dear Rosie, I broke up with my long-term boyfriend a few months ago but found myself back with him on occasion having that 'last time sex' which seemed to happen a bit too much. I was ok with it just being physical and let him know that there would be nothing more then a 'friends with benefits' relationship. The thing is that he couldn't keep it that way. I know that may sound strange that it was the guy doing this but he started to get really clingy and wanted to give it another shot with us. I told him that there was no future of 'us' as a couple but I would love to stay friends with him. He can't accept it. He calls all the time, emails me, shows up at my work…it just doesn't end. I don't know what to do to get him to stop. I really wanted to stay friends with him but I know now that I can't. I just want for him to move on with his life. What can I do? Sincerely, Wanting to Move On A. Dear Wanting to Move On, One of the biggest mistakes that we do when we breakup with people is that we keep in contact with them. With a fresh breakup you need to cut all ties at least for a month or two to get your heart and head in a place where you can deal with how you really feel about that person. Since you are already past that point there are a few things you can still do. First thing you need to do is let your ex know (again) that you do not have those feelings for him anymore and that at this time you don't see a future together and that you both need space apart from each other. Let him know that you'd love to be friends with him in the future but right now that you want him to respect your wishes and not to contact you for at least 2 months. If he still has the same feelings for you then to contact you and you can see where you are both feeling. If he will not stop contacting you then you need to take measures to prevent him from contacting you - change your email address, block his calls and let your work know. If at any time you fear for your safety or anyone you are involved with in the future by your ex you need to contact your local authorities and let them know about the situation. Good Luck and keep me posted! Rosie, The Love Vixen If you have a question on life or love send your thoughts to AskUs@iMatchup.com. |
